Tirico Suave

OK, let’s break down FOX’s latest gaffe from the Yankees’ parade. This one deals with World Series MVP Hideki Matsui and the fact that he’s — gasp — Japanese!

Six-second mark: Fox’s waspy reporter gets a glimpse of Hideki Matsui. His discovery and ensuing yelp is akin to Steve Irwin stumbling upon on a python/crocodile orgy. [...]

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FOX News is reporting live all day from the Yankees’ World Series parade in Manhattan.
Per usual, the coverage is absolutely hilarious.
And we can thank bubbly “reporter” Rosanna Scotto for this dose of humor.

Now, let’s break that clip down.
Scotto, paired up with some faceless wasp, summed up the excitement of seeing the deep-pocketed ballplayers arrive. She [...]

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHA!
Sorry, really.
No, really.

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Tim McCarver went on Big Mikey’s show this afternoon to discuss the impending Phillies vs. Yankees World Series.
Because Big Mikey has a disturbing Mickey Mantle fetish, the talk eventually shifted in that direction.
And this was the result . . .

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Big Mikey Francesa — the purveyor of cutting edge technology — spent part of yesterday’s show giving detailed a lecture on the innerworkings of the computer graphics program Photoshop.
Prepare to get schooled.

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It’s OK, Randy.
I mean, you were going against the best corner on earth.

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Forever plagued by a bad case of Benigno-itis, Jets fans have always expected the worst.
And, really, they willingly accepted it. At a certain point, rooting for the Jets devolved into a strange sadomasochistic-like pleasure quest.
With Rex Ryan in town, Rob Halford’s fantasies can finally be banished. Pain has been replaced by pleasure.
The video above — [...]

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Not all of Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez’s 31 passes were perfect in his debut against the Texans. But that didn’t stop Phil Sims from erecting — literally — four quarters of pro-Sanchez analysis.
Wearing my green-colored contacts, I, too, was forced to employ my very own version of the “tuck rule.”
Now, here’s your chance to get [...]

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The Suave hereby gives CSI Buffalo permission to bid on this idea for a future episode. That is, of course, unless Buffalo has already been absorbed by the Canucks. If that’s the case, well, we don’t want your toy money.

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Everything happens for a reason.
Prior to Gus Johnson’s call on Brandon Stokley’s game-winning 87-yard TD catch, I never really bought into such a philosophy.
Well, now I’m sold.
I mean, why else was Gus scheduled to call a game that was on the verge of slipping into Goodell’s evil ether?

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