Tirico Suave

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Tirico Suave

Entries Tagged as 'NFL'

Lions Sign Worst Cornerback In The History Of Cornerbacking

November 3rd, 2009 · 4 Comments

In honor of the Detroit Lions signing Jason David, I present you with the definitive “Jason David Getting Beat, Run Over Or Just Flat Out Abused” gallery, in reverse chronological order:

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Tags: Despair · Detroit Lions · Harvey Bars · Jason David · NFL

Detroit Footballer Makes Impressive Play

November 2nd, 2009 · No Comments

Sure, my favorite football team has only won two of their last 31 games and just lost to a team that had lost 17 straight games, but goddamn, they can sure as hell light up white guys on special teams. Take that, Danny Amendola!

Via The Big Lead.

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Tags: Detroit Lions · Harvey Bars · NFL

Adrian Peterson Cordially Introduces William Gay To His Shoulder, Bottom Of Left Cleat

October 26th, 2009 · No Comments

Hello, new favorite highlight of the 2009 season!

Wow. That’s an all-timer. I don’t think it tops this sublime 24 seconds of grainy footage but it’s certainly in the conversation and the Greg Jones clip took place in college and didn’t end with him getting down on one knee and unleashing a feral scream to the [...]

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Tags: Adrian Peterson · Harvey Bars · NFL

Jeff Fisher T-shirts Worthy Of Outrage

October 21st, 2009 · 1 Comment

A Peyton Manning jersey?
Child’s play.
If Jeff Fisher had sported the following T-shirts, the media and fans would have every right to grab their pitchforks and torches.

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Tags: Losloseeboy · NFL

Titans Fans Over Jersey-Gate, Enraged In Debate Over Jeff Fisher’s Sexuality

October 21st, 2009 · No Comments

Eventually, Tennessee Titans fans will manage to get the image of head coach Jeff Fisher donning a Peyton Manning jersey out of their collective heads.
But I gather the image above will not fade away quite as quickly.
I can only imagine how this conversation went.

Tony: “Jeff, the Lord forgives sucky coaching — not cock-sucking.”
Jeff: “At least [...]

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Tags: Losloseeboy · NFL · The closest The Suave gets to NASCAR coverage

Skins Strip Zorn Of Wife-Calling Duties

October 21st, 2009 · 1 Comment

Pic via here.
WASHINGTON, DC – Further continuing the effort to right the ship wayward ship that is his franchise, Dan Snyder said today that head coach Jim Zorn will no longer be in charge of contacting and speaking to his own family and that former NFL head coach Lindy Infante will now perform those functions.

It’s [...]

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Tags: Foot Long Hot Dogs · Harvey Bars · Jim Zorn · Lindy Infante · NFL

Why “Chargers” and “Passionate Fan Base” Should Never Be Uttered In The Same Sentence, Part II

October 17th, 2009 · No Comments

Via here.
I guess nothing should surprise me anymore about the Charger faithful after nearly having a home playoff game blacked out, but then again struggling to not have a MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL GAME against your undefeated division rival blacked out is quite the achievement in collective fan apathy itself.

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Tags: Harvey Bars · High Horse · NFL

Statue That’s Supposedly Resembles Thurman Thomas Mysteriously Vanishes

October 13th, 2009 · 2 Comments

Via

I’m not saying the Thurman Thomas statue looks as bad as most bobbleheads. I’m saying it looks worse. I’d also like to insinuate that if Buffalo ever decides to honor Dr. Bunsen Honeydew for whatever reason, they could use the same statue, should it ever turn up. Just remember folks:

“It’s pretty hard, it’s pretty big [...]

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Tags: Buffalo Bills · Collectibles · Harvey Bars · NFL

Jim Laslavic Has 99 Problems; Jay-Z’s Ownership Of The Nets, Rap Lyrics In General To Name A Few

October 13th, 2009 · 3 Comments

Occasionally the calamity that is the evening news seeps its way onto my tv screen. It’s always the same thing that every marginal 80’s comedian told you about: murderdeathkills, canned deliveries, forced banter. It is is my amateur observation that evening news shows haven’t progressed one bit in the last 15 years. And this piece [...]

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Tags: Detroit Lions · Douchebaggery · Harvey Bars · High Horse · NFL · Politics

Rex Ryan Politely Disagrees With Your Assessment

October 12th, 2009 · 2 Comments

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Tags: Harvey Bars · NFL · Rex Ryan · Salty Language