Tirico Suave

A quote from Alouette GM Jim Popp from this article:
“I would say there’s about an 80-20 chance of him being at training camp, coming in and competing for a job. It’s not completed yet, but he can come in as a CFL rookie and we’ll make an assessment of him, where he’s at in his [...]

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Want to have a potato sack race, son? Only the bag is plastic and I’m going to put it over your head. Go! Courtesy of Rotoworld:
Free agent DL Darrion Scott was formally charged today for allegedly assaulting his son last week. Scott will face two felony charges and one misdemeanor charge. The boy’s mother allegedly [...]

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“Sure, Bobby, whatever makes you happy. Small bills, ok? Do you have an offshore account we could direct deposit this in right this minute? Perhaps you’d accept an open-ended hedge fund for your troubles. One thing’s for certain is that we’d definitely feel better if we were able to lock you up. You’re a big [...]

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Witnesses must have described the suspect as ‘being a perfect teammate’ and ‘running precise, crisp routes’ away from the crime scene. If this does in fact turn out to be true, I will be forced to throw out any preconceived notions I have about any athlete, good or bad. Maybe David Eckstein’s a gang banger. [...]

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Free agent running back Shaun Alexander is in Cincinnati for a visit. As a service to you, please allow me to translate some of the quotes from this article:
“The agent for Shaun Alexander said Thursday that his client is scheduled to visit the Bengals on Monday, but Jim Steiner stressed the visit is “very preliminary.”

“Even [...]

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Tatum Bell, Brian Calhoun and Aveion Cason better watch their backs because Artose Pinner is a Lion again! Choke on that Olandis Gary and Luke Staley. Pinner’s main job will be to contribute on special teams but have you seen his numbers from Atlanta last year? Five carries for 46 yards! That’s like 19 yards [...]

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Ming the Merciless really did planet Mongo and his faithful followers a disservice by “skyjacking” Flash Gordon, instead of waiting until 1983 and suck-beaming in perennial loser Ken O’Brien. Unless being on the losing end of some not so memorable contests with Dan Marino is a quality intergalactic quarterback heroes need to posses, there’s [...]

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A Tennessee Grand Jury has indicted Tyrone Calico. Surprisingly, it had nothing to do with a Class Action Lawsuit filed by incensed former fantasy owners. It has something to do with drunk driving or whatnot. How are you 6-4 and run a 4-3 and have career totals of 42 catches for 501 yards and 4 [...]

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I always saw him more as a left guard type but apparently he’s a speedy runner from Central Florida. He probably would have went higher but he had a few character issues, like the fact that he smokes, curses a lot and associates with known heroin users.

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Kill me.

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